forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Please, let me fuck your mom
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
