The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize