the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Randomize
