id be glad to
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
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