thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
