I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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