Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
