Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
