is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
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