Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Randomize
