a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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