All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
