He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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