I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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