you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
