I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
