Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
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