i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
