nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
he just fucked me for my cheese.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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