Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Dear god my vagina.
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