so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
