i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
