Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
My breasts were aching with rage.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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