did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
