Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
