He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
