from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
