we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
