p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
