Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
