no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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