The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
