Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
