how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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