with your own penis?
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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