If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
