Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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