i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize