I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize