the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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