new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I think I sprained my soul last night
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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