Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
