We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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