That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
how does that bad decision feel?
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
