I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
