i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
