bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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