This is not my ceiling
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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