problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Randomize
