I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Randomize