idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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